“I wanna support the people that I’m close to, but not at the expense of my own health and wellbeing. I can better draw those lines and individuate because I’m not so dysregulated by and afraid of other people’s emotional experience.”
-Elisabeth Kristof, Trauma Rewired Co-Host and Founder of Brain Based Wellness and Neuro Somatic Intelligence Certification
Do you prioritize other people’s emotions over your own? Do you depend on someone else to regulate your emotions? Are shame and perfectionism driving you to overgive?
In our conversation about Setting and Receiving Boundaries with Margy Feldhuhn, the topic of codependency was brought up. We think a deeper exploration of codependency is important, because it’s so intertwined with attachment wound and has such a profound effect on relationships with others and ourselves.
In this episode we’re zooming in to define codependency and explore how it develops in our brain as well as how it shows up in our different relationships from a Neuro Somatic Intelligence perspective. We’re also examining the impact of codependency on the nervous system and long term health consequences.
Then we talk about moving out of codependency into interdependence by creating safety within yourself. That journey begins with learning the language of your nervous system and developing regulation practices.
We, also, share reflections on our personal journeys to interdependence. Jennifer shares her personal experience of recognizing a codependent dynamic in a friendship that mirrored her mother’s patterns. She shares the importance of reshaping not just relationships but also her own nervous system.
We truly believe it’s possible for you to create interdependent relationships, too. It starts with creating some safety inside of yourself and getting to know your own nervous system. Join us on the site for two free weeks of Neuro Somatic training and work with us live and in community to get started. Go to www.rewiretrial.com to get started.
Conversation Highlights:
- Jennifer talks about the caretaking dynamic in codependent relationships
- Elisabeth outlines the many signs of codependency
- Limiting beliefs and lack of self trust that come from codependency
- Stifled self-expression that comes from codependency
- How codependency serves the deep need for survival of the nervous system
- Role of early childhood neglect
- How unmet emotional needs in early childhood may be interpreted by the brain as abandonment
- Impact of self-sacrificing on the nervous system and long term health
- Shame and loneliness aspect of codependency
- Elisabeth questions the concept of personality disorder and challenges the idea that they are inherent and unchangeable
Listen to more episodes of Trauma Rewired HERE
